***Trigger Warning! References about religious beliefs.
There’s a lot going on in the world right now and I want to be sensitive to the fact that emotions can flair as a result of (perceived) challenges to the faith and beliefs people may have as we explore this topic.
The church has been a source of financial trauma in the Black community since slavery and continues to perpetuate those traumas today. When we sit and examine one of the most common money beliefs in the Black community that “money is the root of all evil” we can pull on a thread that only begins to unravel into layers upon layers of coercion and abuse that many often overlook giving the “glory to God”.
Specifically related to money, one could argue that the institution of the church —a distinction from the practice of Christianity—has been weaponized to promote financial complacency and a willful surrendering of riches through tithing.
The Church And Slavery
It’s no secret that the Bible was used to justify American chattel slavery by Christian slave owners across the United States and the Caribbean. Enslaved Africans would carry and disguise their spiritual traditions within the practice of Christianity because while most slaves were not permitted to actually read the bible—or read at all— they were allowed to worship in the faith of their “owners”. With time however traditions, language, and culture, were in many ways forgotten, lost, or pieced together into something similar but not quite the same as the original. Christianity became the accepted faith whether through fear, compliance, or a lack of knowledge of any alternative.
The Church As A Representation Of Hope
Some of the core tenets of Christianity emphasize a belief in the afterlife where either you are rewarded for your deeds and demonstrations of faith in heaven or you are punished and tormented for eternity in the fires of hell. While this concept of judgment and the afterlife is not uniquely Christian it does speak to an attitude of submission to suffering and “faith” with delayed gratification to enjoying riches, health, and even freedom in an afterlife. Although the institution of slavery has been abolished on paper, there is still an undercurrent of this delayed gratification that has spilled out into the contemporary Black experience. Popular idioms such as :
“Jesus take the wheel”
“God got it”
and “Look at God!”
Are echoes of the spiritual and emotional dissociation from the trauma of abuse endured through generations. This blind faith in the idea that although I’m suffering now, I will be rewarded for my commitment to God in the afterlife was not only necessary for survival at the hands of unquestionable atrocities but continued to act as a beacon in times of uncertainty, fear, pain, and more.
Financial Values And The Church
In my training to become an accredited financial counselor one of the questions we famously spend time exploring is around client values vs financial goals relating to tithing.
The question loosely reads, “If you have a client who is having trouble meeting their financial goals around budgeting or saving but you notice they are committed to tithing how do you advise them?”
Intuitively you might say well it’s common sense for them to decrease or stop tithing entirely while they get their finances in order! However, the right answer is to focus on helping the client to align their values (in this case religious tithing) to their goals (budgeting, saving, paying down debt, etc). The job of the counselor in this case isn’t to tell the client what to do, but to help the client see how their decision clashes with their goals and create an environment where they feel comfortable making the change.
Although this is a hypothetical scenario, it is rooted in realism.
I have heard personal accounts of people who would tithe despite not being able to pay their electric bill or who didn’t have enough money for groceries. What’s worse is that despite the financial suffering one might be experiencing, the existence of mega-churches and high-income pastors introduces a paradox in that members of the congregation have to delay their riches to the afterlife, but the religious leader gets to enjoy his riches now—a dynamic that is eerily similar to that of a not so distant past rooted in slavery.
Money Beliefs Tied Into Trauma
There was a short time period in my life where I believed that in order to have wealth someone had to do something that was morally or ethically wrong to achieve it. Although I personally did not grow up in the church, by cultural extension somehow I must have picked up that subconscious money belief and ran with it. This is consistent with one of the money scripts developed by Dr. Brad Klontz known as Money Avoidance. During my financial awakening, I realized that this belief was simply not true. Yes, certainly there are people who are immoral or unethically gaining wealth. However, there are examples of people who aren’t.
Additionally, the acquisition of wealth—especially if you don’t come from a wealthy background— can result in feelings of guilt or shame that sound like “I don’t deserve to be wealthy” or “I don’t deserve to have this money”. This too is consistent with the money avoidance script and can result in excessive spending, donating, or tithing because to feel morally and ethically aligned you may want to simply get rid of as much of the money as you can as fast as you can because having it makes you feel uncomfortable.
The church is there to capitalize on this trauma with an open hand giving you the reassurance that not only are you doing the right thing, but that you will be rewarded for it in the afterlife.
That is why the very first chapter of my book “Financially Irresponsible” is titled “Money is not the Root of all evil”. Because even though the quote money is the root of all evil is a misquote of scripture that reads “the love of money is the root of all evil”, the misquote has become a cultural staple in embodying these money beliefs tied into scripture.
“Dear Money”
Although your inherited traumas and acquired beliefs about money are not your fault, you alone are responsible for addressing them and healing. Fortunately, this is something that is doable with hard work and the right support systems. As you sit with your thoughts on how religion or spirituality may influence and impact your money beliefs and values—or the money beliefs and values of your loved ones— it’s important to approach healing with curiosity and an open mind. Really inspect how and why you feel the way you do about money, what money represents or means to you, what you believe about your deserving or acquiring of money, and how you want to use money in your life.
I recently did an exercise where I wrote a letter to money. I wrote as if money was a person that I knew and shared my thoughts and feelings on the relationship I have and would like to have with money. When you have some time I’d encourage you to do the same. Write a letter to money and tell money how you feel about it. I turned my dear money letter into a video so that you could get an idea of how this exercise works. See the video below.
One of the tools I’ve created to help you examine your relationship with money from a tactical and behavioral perspective is the workbook F.L.O.W. or “Financial Lessons On Wellness”. Within FLOW you’ll not only have access to exercises, charts, templates, and information related to money systems and financial psychology, but there is plenty of space for you to write and journal on your experiences or thoughts while you work in the workbook. It truly is a masterpiece and I don’t just say that because I created it. You can purchase your copy of FLOW below.
This past weekend I was awarded at the Financial Therapy Association’s 2023 conference for being an outstanding community outreach leader. Although I couldn’t be in attendence, this award means a lot to me for many reasons. To be recognized at an academic conference as one of (if not the only) nonacademic for my work around financial trauma and financial therapy is amazing. It lets me know that people are listening, paying attention, and are moved by the work I do.
Congratulations!