Do You Feel You Relate More To Poor People?
Obviously… but , wait a minute.
I was recently having a conversation with a friend about changing up my marketing efforts to target first generation, high income, Black professionals and mentioned that I was having a little bit of trouble finding my footing in delivering the message.
He asked me “Do you feel you relate more to poor people?”
I honestly had to stop for a second and search my feelings. I spend a lot of time studying and sharing my findings relating to financial therapy and the impact of our early experiences on our current choices…
I just… don’t often apply that knowledge to myself.
I remember a version of me that didn’t know what credit was, how to budget, why I should save, or the difference between a debit and ATM card. I speak about that version of me quite often in an effort to showcase an example of how shifts in ones mindset and financial education and create significant change in your financials.
I also remember a version of me who sat across the table from millionaires and “mass affluent” clients telling them which credit cards they should apply for, what type of accounts they needed to open, or that their money was better suited in some type of investment rather than sitting in their savings account.
As much as this was my job it was also my experience. I didn’t ever feel uncomfortable talking to people who had money.
Some of these interactions would result in an “elevation of tastes” when it came to how I showed up, what I found to be acceptable or tolerable, where I wanted to eat, etc.
Some of the attitudes and tastes of the people I served started to rub off on me and as such I started to feel disconnected from people who hadn’t had these exposures.
But these exposures didn’t take away from my experiences. If anything these exposures weren’t even my experiences—they were theirs, and I got to hijack them because of the work I did.
Suddenly I felt like I existed in a sort of limbo. The people I went home to couldn’t exactly relate to the things I’d learn about certain etiquettes and habits “the wealthy” had that I’d pick up on. They didn’t understand my frugality or vigilance around money. They did however know that I knew something and that’s how I became the resident financial guy.
Although I can relate to the poor experiences of my childhood, I can relate more to the demographic of “me’s” that slip through the crack.
The ones burdened with always having the answer.
The ones burdened with the expectation of lending money or bailing friends and family out financially.
The ones who know a thing or two about how to manage money (or at the very least what is working for them in the moment) but not what to do to grow it or plan for it long term.
The ones who don’t get the attention or support they need because they’re not rich enough to work with, or have feelings of mistrust towards financial services professionals.
I realize now that although I relate to the experiences of poor people, I relate more to the people who are like me.
And that’s my superpower.